What do you think of teenage sex?

Tell us what you think about teenagers having sex? What are you/will you be teaching your teens about sex?

(remember, at Anonymousmom.com when you respond, you do NOT have to leave your name, email or link to your blog… but if you want to – feel free)

24 thoughts on “What do you think of teenage sex?

  1. Kimberly

    I think it is so rampant that sex is no longer special in our society, and that is really said. Teenagers (as a whole), even the good ones, have no concept of waiting or that they are in fact still kids.

  2. Anonymous

    I am appalled at how “proud” kids are today when they share with everyone that they are “doing it” with their boy or girl friends. My son just recently graduated – his group of friends call him their “Moral Compass” – he hasn’t been sexually active and does intend to wait until he’s married. He actually has liked certain girls; then he finds out they have done all sorts of stuff and he backs away. The rub – he’s actually popular despite the fact he isn’t “doing it” – and it saddens me to think that kids believe they have to be active in order to have friends.

  3. Anonymous

    Having two teenagers, I’m not for the idea, at all. I’m not ready to be a Grandmother! I’m happy to say that neither have had sex and I think that all the talking and being open with them has helped a lot. So many people get embarrassed talking to their kids about sex and that is where the crucial things are missed. Stop being embarrassed and talk to them! It will make a world of difference.

    Kids just do not realize that having sex, even once, can be a lifetime commitment.

  4. Anonymous

    I’m afraid of it. Though I’d like to say wait until marriage, I realize it is pretty unrealistic these days.

  5. Anonymous

    Absolutely against it. Not only is it against my religious beliefs, but at that age teenagers just aren’t responsible enough to be engaging in such an adult act. Sex is great and wonderful, but it does not belong in the lives of teenagers.

  6. Anonymous

    Sex has just be come the “fun” thing to do. Instead of being an experssion of love to your husband/wife. I have already had some talks with my older son (he’s 8) and plan to keep that line of communication open. My younger son (who is 6) I haven’t had to have the talk with him yet. But if he starts asking questions like his brother did then I will talk with him about it too. The body is a beautiful thing and sex is an act of love not the “cool” thing to do.

  7. Anonymous

    I have spoken to both my sons (ages 9 and 12) about this. I think the earlier the better. I remember when I was a teenager, no one told me anything about sex….so yeah I did it for the first time when I was 14. I look back when my parents were teenagers and they were doing it too because my mother was 18 when she had me. I don’t think it’s going to go away and I don’t condone it of course. I think it’s up to the parents to teach their kids about it and if they are going to do it then at least have protection and keep it to yourself. We can’t stop them from doing it but we can teach them consquences and about diseases and what happens if the girl gets pregnant and so on.

  8. Amy

    No, not really. I feel it’s very important to be open with my son and I plan to. I’d prefer him not to have sex in highschool. And, once he does start having sex, I’m hoping it’s not with a random person, but someone he’s in a relationship with. If he doesn’t want to wait until marriage, I’m okay with that. I didn’t and then decided to abstain until I got married. I wish I hadn’t. I think it would’ve changed things. Sex is an important aspect of marriage.

  9. anonymous

    Well, when I was a teenager I saw nothing wrong with it!
    Now that I have a pre-teen who’s getting very close to the age I was when I started “experimenting”, I’m a little worried. Although she won’t even get close to a boy unles they are playing soccer, so I think I’m safe with her for awhile.
    I think that grown ups need to understand that just telling a child “Having sex as a teen is against my rules and you won’t do it!” Isn’t going to do anything but push them into their love interest’s arms. You have to sit down, talk with your child like they are a real person, and get to the *root* of the issue. Insecurity, attention, scared of being made fun of at school, there’s a hundred reasons why kids have sex so young and it’s NOT to disobey their parents. They want our attention, they want us to take them shopping for the day and say “Hey, HOney, let’s talk. What’s really going on in your life? I love you, and I care about you.”

  10. Willow

    As much as I understand that teenage sex is inevitable to some extent, I hate it. Teens don’t have the emotional tools to cope with all of the feelings that can come from sex, whether it’s casual or committed. And they sure don’t have the tools to cope with the consequences!

    I have talked to my kids about safe sex. And the school has rammed it down their throats. I hope they’ve listened.

  11. Anonymous

    Absolutely against it! Not when I was a teen tho! I wish I would’ve stuck to my guns & held on to my virginity for my hubby! It scarred me in a way that will never be the same. Birth control education almost sounds like a good idea but for teens it’s a ways to avoid the consequences of their actions…not all consequences tho since STDs can be spread even w/ a condom. We need to raise the bar & expect purity before marriage period. I can hear you say: that’s not reality. I know but the only way to get more from them is to expect more. Raise the standard. In every way, emotionally, physically, spiritually, intellectually, teenage sex is wrong. Living together actually increases the divorce rate. Sex is a glue that glues you two together in a way that needs to be saved for marriage. Especially w/ the giu/girl differences…I am old fashioned, but it worked better when that was the norm.

  12. peeking in

    I agree that sex needs to be saved for marriage. I didn’t and I wish I had, I couldn’t tell my husband I was waiting for him. I did tell him I was practicing for him. LOL

  13. Lydia

    I think people should concentrate on making sure these kids have birth control since teens have been having sex since the beginning of time. Does it make it right, I don’t believe so but the reality is at least lets not ignore that the situation does exist and approach them with abstinence information and how to protect themselves.

  14. Meg

    I have a 1 year old son now so I am not worried about this topic yet, but when I was in high school I experimented without losing my virginity if you know what I mean. But I found out that I was pregnant with him just after I turned 21 and it scared me because I was still a kid myself.

  15. Anonymous

    Depends on the teenager. Not all teenagers are alike- I’ve met some that are more mature than “adults” who are ten years older. Fourteen year olds? Not ready to be having sex. Seventeen, eighteen, or nineteen year olds? If they’re ready, I’d say to go for it. If not, hold back. It’s a personal decision, not one that other people need to be making for them.

  16. Kaytii

    I’m against it but am realistic. My older daughters (14 & 11) know that my biological mom was 14 when she had me and that I was 19 when I got pregnant, then married. I’ve told them repeatedly that they should wait till they’re married (I wish I had)but, again, not realistic. So, when it seems they’re ready to take the plunge, we’ll provide them with the right birth control. I have a very open relationship with them. I halfway am holding my breath that they will at least wait until they graduate from college but, we’ll see.

  17. Anonymous

    Well for someone who had teenage sex I feel conflicted but I believe that I(we) were more prepaired (careful) than the kids now days. Pregnancy is the least of some kids worries just having them without the sake of marriage or even close to talking about marriage its almost like a prerequiste to dating now days. Back when I committed to the act pregancy was a death threat for us and just to have it happen was shameful now its no big deal. All the teenage kids in my family well the kids that are around 17 and up are pregnant my son was one of them but they decided to have an abortion because they felt to young. Another subject that I’m conflicted on.

  18. Anonymous

    While I don’t expect my children to wait until they’re married; I do expect them to be selective and at least wait until they’re older in their teen years. I’m thinking at least maybe 18. I was 18 when I first had sex and ended up marrying my first. I was extremely selective and wasn’t just going to have sex with anyone. I needed to feel a connection and I’m hoping I can impart the importance of a deeper connection to my children. Also, we were both old enough to understand the importance of safe sex and using protection both for the prevention of disease and pregnancy.

  19. Katie

    Its really kind of funny how some women are in denial about when their kids have sex. While it isn’t a good idea for the kids to have sex as a teenager, it happens. I would prefer the kids not to have sex until they are older and more responsible, but I cannot control them forever, just guide them in the right direction.

  20. Anonymous

    I’ll be honest. I had sex the first time when I was 14. Then I didn’t even kiss another boy until I was 16. Then the sex ensued. I’m not sad or regretful that I became sexually active when I was a teenager-not at all. It taught me to find myself, to know my limits and what was wrong and right in a relationship. I learned to dissect and analyze a relationship with far more accuracy than any older adult female I knew at the time. I avoided troublesome relationships and learned which guys to steer clear from. I learn the power of sexuality, and I’m not going to lie: unlike a lot of older women, I have an incredible sex life because I let go of those fears, insecurities and all that other nonsense a while ago…It’s experience…what’s the whole point of getting married, having “sex” when then you have no idea that what you are experiencing is nowhere near to what sex is really like. I dunno, there are ALWAYS exceptions…but I prefer to have tested the waters a bit earlier on. Teenage sex is inevitable, especially if you end up having a son or daughter who is inclined to this behavior by being a more sexual being to start of with…which was my case.

  21. anonymous

    I don’t approve of teenage sexual relationships. I think when teenagers have sex, they are putting themselves at risk for consequences they are not prepared to cope with(e.g. pregnancy).
    I have a 16 year old daughter, and even though I can’t be with her 24/7, I want to be the voice in her head that says sexual relationships at her age are not okay. I want to be as involved in her life as possible so that I can encourage her to focus on other areas of her life(being with her girfriends, her afterschool job, her hobbies). There will be opportunities for my daughter to have serious/sexual relationships when she is a mature adult.

  22. Paula

    I just found out today that my 8th grade son is taking ATM (abstinence til marriage) for the next 3 days. I asked him if he knew how babies were made and said he thinks he does. I told him to come to either myself or my husband if he has questions. I have had 2 very good friends become grandmothers in the past year. One girl is almost like a daughter to me and our kids have grownup together (except the past 5 yrs as we moved to another state). It has been a heart-breaking experience for all of us. When I talk to my friend it is unreal how hard this is for her. She has 3 other kids and became divorced about 2 years ago. So now she has a grandchild to support too. Her daughter is a senior now and will go to nursing school in the fall and hopefully will move out after that. She’s a great girl and very intelligent, but she did not realize she could get pregnant if you didn’t use a condom every time! Anyway, my goal is for our 2 sons to get through school and college and then get married and then have kids. I hope it turns out that way. Very scary!

  23. Secret

    I have two boys and I am still a teen myself I am 19 years old and I wish my parents would of been around to talk to me about sex. I was raised by my grandparents and they wouldn’t even talk to me about having a first kiss much less the sex talk. i wish someone would of talked to me about it. Teen sex can lead to teen parents


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