What are you afraid that people will find out about you?

What are you most afraid of that people will find out about you?

(remember, at Anonymousmom.com when you respond, you do NOT have to leave your name, email or link to your blog… but if you want to – feel free)

72 thoughts on “What are you afraid that people will find out about you?

  1. Anonymous

    That I’m not as good as they think. People think of me as sweet, kind, quiet but friendly, and just a good person. But I’m really not, and I try to keep people from knowing how bad I can really be.

  2. Anonymous

    *How imbalanced I can be. Though, I’m getting better.

    *I don’t regret our son, but there are so many moments that I MISS life without a child.

    *How much of a nympho I can be!! lol

  3. Anonymous

    That I like to watch porn and so does my husband. An we have no problem with that in our relationship.

  4. Anonymous

    That I had an abortion because my ex couldn’t grow balls to stand up against his parents! I felt I had to choice or he was going to force me to carry it and to give it up for adoption!

  5. Samantha

    That I spend so much money on beauty products and other self items that I’ve made it difficult for us to have the things we need. I lie and blame it on bills.

  6. Anonymous

    That I am sexually attracted to my husbands boss. I have fantasies involving him, his wife and my husband and myself. Everytime I see him it drives me crazy..

  7. Anonymous

    That I am not the person people think I am. I’m not that nice, I think really bad thoughts about people, and I can very mean. I’m also afraid people would find out that I’ve had an affair. My husband doesn’t even know and the guilt is killing me.

  8. Anonymous

    I am medicated, psycho, & can be mentally unstable in a heartbeat! But I’ve told so many people now…it’s freeing to hear other moms say the same!

  9. Anonymous

    I am worried they will find out that I break down a few times a day. That I sit here in tears because I have such a hard time handling two babies. One always seems to be crying. Then one will always want to be held. I am only one person. I can’t give both of them my full 100% attention at all times and you can’t explain that to babies. I feel like a horrible mother because they are not getting what they seem to want/need. So many moms seem to have it together and I don’t. I pretend to. I wouldn’t want anyone to know I am failing at being a mom of twins. They would be so much better off with a mom who cope a lot better.

  10. Anonymous

    That I cannot stand my step-daughter, and that she’s making my life miserable, and I just want my family to be just me, my husband, and my kids, and i wish her mom would one day show up at the front door so I can stop being her mom!

  11. Anonymous

    That I am a Medium and have been since birth. My parents & grand-parents know, of course, because I would tell them things as a small child not knowing that what was real to me was special & out of the ordinary. Since I am a Christian I’ve always been told it’s a gift & it’s one my family has helped me not to speak about publicly for fear of being shamed or what have you.
    I don’t seek anyone out from the other side, they come to me. It’s been a blessing for me, not so much a “curse” as some may see it.
    My husband does know about it and is fascinated by it. My children don’t know about it but I am prepared to speak to them about it one day since I think one of my girls also has the “gift”.

  12. kristal

    I,m afraid people will find out that my “perfect” husband is a crack adict ,that he’s been using since he was 17, that my life is not as perfect as it seems, I’m also tired of being a stay at home mom, that sometimes I wish I had no family,no kids, and that I’m gay and I could’nt be my self because of my family’s strong conservative believes. and also that I’m so tired of pretending to be everything I don’t want to be.

  13. Anonymous

    I’m afraid someone will find out that my husband and I haven’t had sex since we concieved our daughter two and a half years ago.

  14. Anonymous

    ~ I cheated on my husband with 3 men
    ~ Everyone including my husband thinks our daughter is his.. I know she isnt, I Re-met my highschool boyfriend and she is his

  15. Anonymous

    I am afraid people will find out that I am not as strong as I appear to be. I will do anything for my fiance, I mean anything.

  16. Anonymous

    That sometimes I self medicate to make it through the day. That I am obsessed with what people think of me. That I hate my body. That sometimes I just want to run away.

  17. Psycho

    Although I am highly educated, pretty, loving, kind, and funny, I have Bipolar I and can become a complete lunatic and have severe boughts of depression when the stress is too great. Not too many people, except family, know that I suffer from this horrible illness, not to mention my son also suffers from it. Most people believe I am this wonderful, but sometimes moody, person. If they only knew…

  18. Anonymous

    That we haven’t paid our taxes. We are ovrwhelmed with this new business and it just keeps piling up! Yikes. I need help.

  19. Anonymous

    I live with an abusive man, but can’t leave because he’s threatened to take our children. He looks like the great community guy, hard worker with 2 jobs and I look like the lazy, bad tempered wife. He would win in a custody battle. I have no friends. He has many. He abuses drugs too. No one knows it. He’s very functioning and looks like a hero all the time. No one has any idea.

  20. Anonymous

    I am the person in my family that everyone looks to for strength and support. If they knew who I really was, the twisted slut who caught hiv out of sheer stupidity over some guy, they would be ashamed to be even related to me. Currently I completely lack purpose in my life and desire to have the structure that college once supplied. Graduated with a masters degree and not a clue what to do with it. Oh and that I’m a man and that men need to be able to confess these things too.

  21. Cheater

    My husband found out that i had an affair and we worked it out but he doesnt know I had another affair a year later.

  22. Anonymous

    i appear to be the best mother to everyone i am not in my eyes i shout and scream on occassion,. sometimes i feel like my son would be better off without me as i am not a fully functioning human being. I often feel like a coiled spring, obsessed with mess and feel like my head is covered with fog. am i depressed, am i unhappy do i need a shag? i havent had one for 4and a half years my sons dad left me wen i wa spreganant i havent bothered with anyone since apart fronm one stuopisd indescretion wen he was one yr old. i love my son and know he loves me wot the fuck is wrong with me why do i feel so tired, and unhappy with myself. i love doing things with my son but can loose my patience so quickly i scare myself i never hit but shout and i feel i am affecting him please somebody help me for gods ssake………..

  23. Anonymous

    -That i am not as happy as i seem.
    -That i pretend to be happy.
    -That i considered suicide more than once.
    -That an extended family member felt me up when he was drunk..
    -That my father can be terrible to me and my mom.
    -That my dad hates me.
    -That my family isn’t as happy as everyone thinks it is.

  24. Anonymous

    I am a very genrally well liked and social person and I have many many friends. But inside I have very deep paranoia, so deep that sometimes I think that every passserby will try to mug me. Occansional severe social anxiety and depression branch off from this. I have often thought of suicide in the past. Ive been in an institutuion once and they seemed to prescribed the right medication, buts no its not doing anything and im afraid to tell my parents cause i’m tired of them having to worry over me.

  25. Anonymous

    I began looking at porn quite frequently at 10 years old, too young to handle it emotionally. I pretty much went through everyhting the internet had to offer and some of that disgusting, perverted stuff I saw still sticks in my mind to this day. Im over that now and realize that none of it arouses me, but my biggest fear that someone will find out about it and exploit me.

  26. Anonymous

    that my husband and i don’t have the “perfect” relationship everyone seems to think we have. we fight all the time and never have sex. when i try to talk to him about these problems that we have we just fight. i sometimes want to give up and just leave.

  27. Anonymous

    who I really am. that i cheat on my husband all of the time. I dont love him the way im supposed to. Im in love with another man. and that i hate my father.

  28. Anonymous

    tha i feel i am the worst mother ever and that my children dont deserve a shotty mother like me. i am afraid that everyone will find out how messed up i really am. i think about killing myself….i think abou tleaving my husband. just up and leaving while hes at work. i htink about burning my house down with me locked in it…. i think about throwing myself off of a bridge….

  29. anonymous

    I don’t want my ex’s mother to find out about the ugly parts of his and my past relationship… which were VERY ugly, I assure you.

  30. Anonymous

    That I am a 35 year old female and a virgin.

    I lie and say that I’ve slept with 3 men, but I’ve never even been kissed.

    I’m so ashamed of it and I feel so pathetic and like the world’s biggest loser.

    I just wish I wasn’t so afraid of intimacy, both emotional and physical. I wish I could just go have sex and do what comes so naturally to everyone else, but which scares the hell out of me.

    I am thinking about answering an ad on Craiglist to just have sex with random men so I know what it feels like to do something everyone else has done.

    I hate that there are 12 year olds who have more experience with the opposite sex than I do. I hate that most likely, I will die a virgin and never having known the touch of a man.

  31. Anonymous

    i am so depressed…and if it weren’t for my religion id be dead a LONG time ago…i have both considered and attempted suicide. I am not the Strong, confident, cheerful woman i act to be…I have done NASTY THINGS that no one would ever believe i was capable of doing. i am not proud of these acts.I am scared. I fear death and failure. I hate that i have to put up with my father who is verbally abusive and may occasionally lash out physically…at the same time i love my dad and fear that my form of revenge would give him a heartattack and kill him if he ever found out…I am in love and my lover wants nothing more than to marry me but i will probably not live to see the happy ending…i fear that if i were to die tonight I would have fucked up my life and go to hell…lose lose situation. I have stolen. I have lied. My life is a whole big lie and I am ever so tired of living it…leading this double life is taking its toll on me! I often cry when i am alone and ruminate over negative thoughts. I need help but no one will understand i will be blammed if i try to approach anyone for help. i am lonely

  32. Emma

    I’m alone. I feel dead inside. Nothing can make me smile nad I feel like I’m dying. I cry myself to sleep every night.

  33. Anonymous

    That I am not as perfect as people think. I lie to be accepted and loved because I don’t feel I’m good enough.

  34. Anonymous

    That often I long for death, just to quiet my mind. That I want a divorce, but I’m not even married. That I’m only staying with him because I can’t afford to move out. And that I truly love this man regardless of all the other crap. Wait, that’s no secret! 🙂

  35. Anonymous

    that im a horrible mum i try and try but lose my temper , that i wish i didnt have baby so young at the age of 15 i just wish i had my life back sometimes but do love my son soo much, i hate my body and hate other people that look better then me , that i get so jelouse of my husband being around other girls even if their just frinds because i know he adores me so much … i hate feeling so depressed and ashamed all the time and i am so paranoid of dying i constantly think im going to die.

  36. Anonymous

    That I am not in love with my husband.

    That I am not sure my daughter belongs to him.

    I am in love with another man and I am pretty sure my daughter belongs to him.

    I drink way too much and only stay in this marrige for the children.

    I am bi sexual.

    My parents were swingers when i was little and I walked in on them at the age of 5…

    How kinky I really am… and that I hate sex with my husband and think about the man I love to get through it.

  37. L

    I am a cheater. I lie. One of my children is not my husband’s. I love my husband, but I don’t know how to be good and honest. I think about killing myself a lot. I’m so sad…. And lost.

  38. Anonymous

    I am terrified that someone will find out that I am attracted to women more so than men. I’ve never been with a woman, but it is something that I would love to do someday.

  39. Anonymous

    That I’m not as perfect and strong as I seem. That I’m always afraid of failure. That I cry when no one can see me.

  40. Anonymous

    That I hate myself. That I cut myself. That I am terrified people will see through me, to the REAL me. That they will find out how ugly I really am. How hateful and vicious I really am to myself and others. That they will see the guilt, shame, and regret. They will see I am a failure, a cheater, and a liar. That they will see how pathetic, twisted, weak, selfish, dumb, shallow and disgusting I am. That they will find out how insecure, needy, and cowardice I am. That they will find out how much I want to die. I run from everything. I use people. I’m never happy, never satisfied.

  41. Anonymous

    I’m hate everything about my life no one to love me, no friends, ldont like my Co workers they don’t like me, Not sure if I can love anyone, I’m lonely afraid all the time
    Had affair with married man for20 years. How stupid is that.and still want him. Would kill myself if I didn’t fear going to hell. And now I’m fat

  42. anonymous

    I’m afraid people will find out that this is what i do in my spare time, putting myself down. I literally could have an amazing day, have done really well with assignments or teaching.. but then i come home, and i verbally abuse myself. I call myself fat, and logically i know i am not. I tell myself I have no friends, when logically i know i do, I tell myself i’m unlovable and yet I know there is someone who loves me. I call myself stupid, when also – i know I can do a lot more when i put mind to it. It is like i have a perfection disease, always seeking perfection.
    I hate that my closest female friendships are women i have been friends with since CHILDHOOD who I do not talk to every day or… every week… every 2-3 weeks we talk, the women I have tried to be friends with bully me, and I have not figured out why yet.
    I had a mother tell me always to dress down that way women do not have a reason to get jealous.
    There actually isn’t anything i am afraid of…I guess, I push people away before they hurt me more…I seem addicted to abusive people and I enable them emotionally and mentally abusing me… but this year I said NO MORE and I ended friendships that met crieterias of mental abuse. you know what? I those female friends from childhood, are still my friends.

    Taking a count of how many people you have ever encountered in your life.. lets say for me at 23, i’ve met i dunno, 2300 people… out of those people… count on one hand people you could call: to help you if you got sick, your parents got sick, you needed comfort, to tell the truth always, to not DEPEND no you rather, RELY! in tough times. I only got 8 people that I have met my whole life and 3 of them were family members.

    Makes you think.

    Who cares what everyone else is thinking? It doesn’t matter! AT the end of your life journey – does it matter? Have you lived authentically, do you ever think that maybe everyone’s family is just as dysfunctional as everyone else’s – just different varying degrees?
    Have you ever thought that people that are trying to present an image of perfect are living behind a ego-mask of a skit that does not exist.


    Love yourself, and you’ll find loving others so much easier, and others will find that same open-hearted love easier for you too.

    Other secrets? what are secrets? But shame, stop shaming yourself.
    You goofed, keeping learning, keep growing, grow and grow some more, this is your life. LIVE IT WELL.

  43. Heliah

    Thank you all so much for being so honest on here. You shoud know that by doing so, you have given me strength. You have made me realise i am not alone. We al struggle, we all try to cover-up, and we all make mistakes, but you know what….we’ve all survived…and that is what we need to focus on. We are worthy of it all.

    Thanks again…all of you xoxoxo

  44. anonymous

    That I had a one night stand about 17 years ago. I regret it I don’t want my husband to find out or my family.

  45. Anonymous

    That I have friends in real life and get 1 or 2 opportunities to go out and interact a week but I have social anxiety and fear of judgment and spend too much time on facebook and only get the courage to meet others once a month. The worst I guess, is that the only place in the world I found to express this is as an anonymous poster here.

  46. Anonymous

    That everyone will find out about my eating disorders and look down on me for it. My parents and best friend know but they don’t care. I just keep droppin pounds and purging meals…Also I never want people to find out about the time I was in the mental facility…I’ve only told a handful of people about that. It was an awful time in my life. I’m still suicidal sometimes but I have pills that help…

  47. The EX-wife

    Re to: I live with an abusive man, but can’t leave because he’s threatened to take our children. He looks like the great community guy, hard worker with 2 jobs and I look like the lazy, bad tempered wife. He would win in a custody battle. I have no friends. He has many. He abuses drugs too. No one knows it. He’s very functioning and looks like a hero all the time. No one has any idea.

    I had this exact same scenario. Except my ex had cancer on top of all of that. He was verbally, mentally and physically abusive in front of our 2 children, this was not a every once in awhile thing, it was every single day. I was just a stay-at-home mom with no education and no family able to help, I was so scared that if I were to leave I would loose my kids for sure. I forget what exactly happened to make me leave, but I did! He walked into court with his shit grin, thinking he would win but he didn’t!! I will always have my babies, and even though every day is a struggle, a struggle I wouldn’t have if we were still married, I am so happy I got my kids out of there. I have met an amazing man, who loves me and my children and life has never been better. Just leave him, your kids deserve a happy mom!!

  48. Anonymous

    I do not love equally. From greatest to least: my mom, my dog, my dad, myself my first girlfriend, by brother. Then my friends, but it’s not strong love.

    I hate people, so as interesting as I find the human mind and the medical field, I will only go into veterinary medicine because I can’t fight for human beings. So many of them are terrible, awful creatures. Myself included.

  49. Anonymous

    That I hate my kids, 75% of the time. I wish I never met their father, and I regret the choice to keep the baby i’m carrying….

  50. Anonymous

    That I smoke pot and snort coke to feel the numbness that I have been craving for a very long time. That I have severe depression with manic episodes. That I cut and burn myself to relieve the inner pain. That my kids deserve a better mother.

  51. Jill

    I discipline my children way to much. I tried to lie to myself saying it is for their own good, to keep them in line, teach them a lesson. But the truth is that I do it because I want to, because it gives me a rush, I like doing it!

    They are to young, three and five, to really understand how wrong it is, what I’m doing.

    I get tingly doing it…


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